Keep Calm Trust God

 Keep Calm and Trust God

Tuesday morning, I noticed a small black dot in my vision. In doing some research, I figured this was a floater in my vision that I could ignore and would go away.  I'd had them before and usually they disappeared.  

By that evening, it looked as if there was black lace hanging in front of my right eye.  This was new and frankly concerning.  My husband, an RN was also concerned.  We prayed that evening and called my Eye doctor first thing in the morning.  

I had an appointment within hours.  During the exam, my Doctor discovered that I had a retinal tear and needed emergency laser surgery.  This news was a manifestation of a life long fear. My vision was excellent all my life until a few years ago when I start to need glasses for distance. Hearing about Lasik surgery, I remember being terrified of anything touching my eye and feeling so relieved that I'd never need that.  Eye surgery was a massive phobia for me.  I felt fear starting to rise in me.  I prayed in my heart for peace. Thankfully, my wonderful husband took the day off work and stayed with me the whole time.  The doctor allowed him to stay in the room with me - they gave him special glasses to protect him from the laser.  The surgery was performed about a half an hour after being diagnosed.  I felt minimal discomfort and felt the peace that only our Heavenly Father can bestow.  

Today I'm one day post-op.  I still see the black lace-like floaters and may for some time until the blood in and behind my eye settles.  

So many times in my life, I've prayed and pleaded for the Lord to take away the trials and challenges in my life.  I know that if it was best for me, He would have healed the tear and I wouldn't have to go through the procedure. However, by going through it I learned so many more things.  

1. My husband is my rock. Because of his training as an Emergency Room Nurse, he knew the possible complications but knew me well enough to not talk about the risks, just to help me stay calm. He also expressed how proud he was of me for being strong through the procedure. After 32 years of marriage, my love for him increases daily.

2. My children are amazing! My married daughter came over and was my emotional support as a I talked about everything I'd been through.  She doesn't try to fix my problems, she just listens. I'm extremely thankful that she is my daughter and confidant.  My son kept me in his prayers, and helped with household chores. 

3. In doing this procedure, the Dr. was able to gain more experience for when he performs this procedure again. All those who work at that clinic are able to feed their families because patients require their services.

4. I discovered I'm stronger than I realize. The Lord will send me peace, in turn, I have to choose to accept that peace.  I love the saying, sometimes God calms the storm, sometimes he calms his child.

Scriptures record many instances in which people have to endure trials, heartaches and calamities. When we trust our Father in Heaven and turn to Him, we will rise above the darkness and feel the warmth of His light and love.

Epilogue

My husband wrote an email to the Nurses he supervises. He shared the story, adding that we assumed it might be a migraine aura although I had no headache pain.  He advised them to never assume that it's "no big deal" but check it out! One in ten people as they age will experience a retinal tear.